Parenting Advice

A congratulatory email has come flooding in and alongside the well-wishing, there is much information in it that seems pertinent to young parents. I feel that a portion of it bears reproduction here:-

Heard some quality neds on the upstairs of the no.20 the other day. After the usual stuff about picking fights in the town ( every time ah punch som'bidy ma haun hurts), spraying graffetti etc , ned 1 says to ned 2 " ur yous wanting a boy or a girl?"

Ned 2- " ah want a girl so ah can punch her first boyfriend"

Girl ned- " ah just want the wee bastard oot, and am allowed to call it a wee bastard cos we no married".

ned 1 then passed on his experience of parenting , being the father of both Sean and Connor, advising that as children could learn from parents you had to be "heavy cautious wi' the blaw man".

ned 2 then rehearsed how he would coach his child to answer questions about suspicious bruising- " say yi walked intae a door, right, say yi walked intae a door".

So if you had any concerns about parenting rest assured that with competition like that you'll have no worries. Just as long as you are " heavy cautious wi' the blaw".

Thanks for that Michael.