The Christmas decorations came down yesterday. The holidays are over and I can no longer justify sitting about drinking. Despite our new arrival we managed to have a merry Christmas, entertaining lots of people, on one occasion even providing a pot of soup for seven, count them seven, people. (I bet you didn’t think I could make soup, did you? See, I’m a proper househusband). Having a baby does not necessarily mean the death of your social life. In fact, people seem to enjoy coming round and playing with the baby, probably because it’s easier than having one of their own, they can always give her back when they are finished. All the fun with none of the nappies or crying.
Now, as I have said, the holidays are over, and I am not looking forward to taking all the empties to the bottle bank. On the up-side, I now have a sturdy pram to transport them all in, but anyone who saw me pulling all those wine bottles out from under the pram would probably phone social services. I could make two trips, split the difference as it were, but if I was observed by the same person each time it would look even worse. It’s a real dilemma.
Today Lynne took the baby to the doctors’ for the first time. I stayed here. Lynne put a white shirt on, dressed the baby in some fancy clothes and then dropped her lunch on her. It was beans. Fortunately the beans landed in the pattern on the baby’s dress, so you couldn’t really see it. Then, with the baby in a big pink bear suit, they went to the doctors’.
My daughter got her first injections. They covered a dizzying range of illness, polio, tetanus, whooping cough, diphtheria, and so on. She had one in each leg. Poor mite. One in each leg! I bet she cried like a fire alarm.
Now, as I have said, the holidays are over, and I am not looking forward to taking all the empties to the bottle bank. On the up-side, I now have a sturdy pram to transport them all in, but anyone who saw me pulling all those wine bottles out from under the pram would probably phone social services. I could make two trips, split the difference as it were, but if I was observed by the same person each time it would look even worse. It’s a real dilemma.
Today Lynne took the baby to the doctors’ for the first time. I stayed here. Lynne put a white shirt on, dressed the baby in some fancy clothes and then dropped her lunch on her. It was beans. Fortunately the beans landed in the pattern on the baby’s dress, so you couldn’t really see it. Then, with the baby in a big pink bear suit, they went to the doctors’.
My daughter got her first injections. They covered a dizzying range of illness, polio, tetanus, whooping cough, diphtheria, and so on. She had one in each leg. Poor mite. One in each leg! I bet she cried like a fire alarm.
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