This week we have been taking the baby outside for wee danders about the shops. We have taken her out before, Lynne has even taken her as far as Braehead, but since we have a variety of conveyances for the child and we have pretty much used them all in the past couple of days, I thought I would talk some shit about them, compare them and that. Score them out of ten and the like.
My daughter is pretty underwhelmed by the whole experience of going outside. Its December, its cold, so we bundle her up and she sleeps the whole time. We swore blind that we wouldn’t be the kind of parents that dressed their kid up as an animal but someone gave us a furry snowsuit, with little ears on the hood and the mitts made to look like paws, which the baby looks ridiculous in. We can’t resist. Also, the suit is so cosy that just putting her in it knocks her out. It’s almost instantaneous. It’s a shame we have to take it off her.
Anyway, conveyance number one. The Premaxx Baby Bag. This is a Swedish sling thing with pockets and what have you all over it and it looks the business. Ours is orange and deep red. It goes over one shoulder and you slot the baby in and she hangs across your chest as if she’s in a hammock. It has draw toggles that you have to play with and you need to twist the strap on your shoulder origami style so it takes a couple of goes to work out what to do with it, but the baby looks really snug in there once you have figured it out. Its handy for short trips, you can go into shops that it would be a fight to get a pram into, but since all the weight is on one shoulder, it starts to get a bit sore after a while. I wouldn’t like to walk for miles with it on.
Score: 7/10 great for short trips, a bit complicated and sore on the old shoulder.
Conveyance number two. The Baby Bjorn. This is the same idea as the sling thing, but is more of a rucksack affair with the baby sitting upright on your chest. The straps go over both your shoulders so you can for a bit further with it on before it starts to get too heavy, but I prefer the sling for a couple of reasons. First, the sling looks better. The Baby Bjorn looks like a boring piece of hiking equipment, which gives me the matching-waterproofs horrors. It has a neck support for babies that are too small to hold their own heads up, but this only works if the baby remains motionless, if she tries to have a look around or even falls asleep it makes her head loll around alarmingly. Lastly, the one we have got is second-hand, and I don’t like the idea of putting my daughter into something that someone else has already shat in.
Score: 4/10 functional, boring, and baby can’t even really sleep in it.
Which brings us to conveyance number three, the trusty pram. We have a Mamas and Papas Pliko pramette. I will probably dicuss prams in disparaging detail in a further post, but for now we chose this one because it’s small lightweight and simple, with a cracking turning circle and no pedometer or any of that silly shit. This beast can go for miles. It can carry a formidable amount of shopping in the undercarriage, but be careful with this because it affects the steering. Remember if you pack loads of shit in your pram you still have to push it home. Out of the three methods of transportation this is the one with the most room for the little passenger, she will never look squished, even in a huge furry bear suit. The only problem with it is carrying up and down the stairs to the flat. It’s light but not four-flights-of-stairs light. We have left it chained up at the bottom a few times, but I don’t like doing this because I don’t want it getting manky. There are students live below us and I don’t want them coming home drunk one night and playing with it. I would end up trying to fight them in the stairwell in my underpants.
Score: 9/10 can’t be beaten on range and payload, but it’s a pain in the arse when you live on the top floor.
My daughter is pretty underwhelmed by the whole experience of going outside. Its December, its cold, so we bundle her up and she sleeps the whole time. We swore blind that we wouldn’t be the kind of parents that dressed their kid up as an animal but someone gave us a furry snowsuit, with little ears on the hood and the mitts made to look like paws, which the baby looks ridiculous in. We can’t resist. Also, the suit is so cosy that just putting her in it knocks her out. It’s almost instantaneous. It’s a shame we have to take it off her.
Anyway, conveyance number one. The Premaxx Baby Bag. This is a Swedish sling thing with pockets and what have you all over it and it looks the business. Ours is orange and deep red. It goes over one shoulder and you slot the baby in and she hangs across your chest as if she’s in a hammock. It has draw toggles that you have to play with and you need to twist the strap on your shoulder origami style so it takes a couple of goes to work out what to do with it, but the baby looks really snug in there once you have figured it out. Its handy for short trips, you can go into shops that it would be a fight to get a pram into, but since all the weight is on one shoulder, it starts to get a bit sore after a while. I wouldn’t like to walk for miles with it on.
Score: 7/10 great for short trips, a bit complicated and sore on the old shoulder.
Conveyance number two. The Baby Bjorn. This is the same idea as the sling thing, but is more of a rucksack affair with the baby sitting upright on your chest. The straps go over both your shoulders so you can for a bit further with it on before it starts to get too heavy, but I prefer the sling for a couple of reasons. First, the sling looks better. The Baby Bjorn looks like a boring piece of hiking equipment, which gives me the matching-waterproofs horrors. It has a neck support for babies that are too small to hold their own heads up, but this only works if the baby remains motionless, if she tries to have a look around or even falls asleep it makes her head loll around alarmingly. Lastly, the one we have got is second-hand, and I don’t like the idea of putting my daughter into something that someone else has already shat in.
Score: 4/10 functional, boring, and baby can’t even really sleep in it.
Which brings us to conveyance number three, the trusty pram. We have a Mamas and Papas Pliko pramette. I will probably dicuss prams in disparaging detail in a further post, but for now we chose this one because it’s small lightweight and simple, with a cracking turning circle and no pedometer or any of that silly shit. This beast can go for miles. It can carry a formidable amount of shopping in the undercarriage, but be careful with this because it affects the steering. Remember if you pack loads of shit in your pram you still have to push it home. Out of the three methods of transportation this is the one with the most room for the little passenger, she will never look squished, even in a huge furry bear suit. The only problem with it is carrying up and down the stairs to the flat. It’s light but not four-flights-of-stairs light. We have left it chained up at the bottom a few times, but I don’t like doing this because I don’t want it getting manky. There are students live below us and I don’t want them coming home drunk one night and playing with it. I would end up trying to fight them in the stairwell in my underpants.
Score: 9/10 can’t be beaten on range and payload, but it’s a pain in the arse when you live on the top floor.
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